my daughter is 2yrs 3mths. here's an example of what i'm refering to ; my daughter, her daddy, and i are eating at a restaurant ( nothing fancy but by no means a kids theme'd place. ie, chucky cheese/ mc d's) try to seat her in highchair she starts screaming & kicks the highchair over. so we try a booster seat. that , and the crayons work to keep her happy for awhile but then she starts slidding under the table or trying to stand up on seat. starts to fuss, then starts to scream at the top of her lungs. now mind you, she doesn't behave like this at home. i've tried to spank her but that doesn't faze her and taking her outside is like rewarding her cuz thats what she wanted in the first place. it's the same at stores or just about anywhere we go. she screams& throws herself on the ground. we could just never take her anywhere but i want to socialize her and teach her manners. i'm just at a loss on how to go about it.|||Spanking a child under the age of 3 really does not do any thing but confuse them.. instead try a few fake restraunt/shopping runs, knowing full well that once the behavior gets out of line you pack up and go home. Ok Susie, your not behaving in the restraunt, we are going home and you are going to take a nap.... and do it after 2 or 3 practice runs, she will get the idea that naughty behavior means we leave immediatly and go home to bed.|||You've got two different issues. The first is not tolerating tantrums in public or otherwise. The second is the expectation that a two-year old will reliably sit through a meal at a restaurant. You can tame the tantrums, but I don't think it's a realistic expectation that she'll always have the patience for a meal out. Ignore the tantrums and never, ever give in to what she is throwing the tantrum about. I found the most effective method is to just leave. We have been at a playground or out somewhere and my son misbehaves. I give him a warning and if he continues, I pick him up and calmly say, "we're leaving". He is usually stunned and it makes a real impression!|||From the time my son was 18 months until he was 3 and a half, my son tried those same things. We'd go to a restaurant and he'd flip out, crying, screaming, throwing things. Once on my birthday he was so mad he couldn't try my beer that he dumped his drink on his dads lap. So we decided instead of trying to get him to behave in restaurants we just wouldn't bring him. We didn't think it was fair to other dinners. We would try it occasionally, but would usually end up having our meal boxed up and going home. He would also do the same thing at stores. I remember him trying to launch himself out of the front of the grocery cart, kicking and screaming. If my husband was with us, he'd usually scoop him up and bring him to the car, put him in his car seat and not show him any special attention. If I was by myself I would ignore the behavior (usually I would hum to myself) hurry up and get what I needed as quickly as possible. I'm not a big fan of spanking, my husband tried it and it didn't help, it just made the situation more out of control. Talking to him about his behavior didn't work either. I'm sure bribing him might have made a little bit of a difference but then he would expect something for behaving. So instead we would get take out, go through a drive through, or get a babysitter until we could take him out again. Which was when he was around 4. He's 6 now and really great to take places and a lot of fun. I wouldn't worry about socializing or manners. Manners can be learned just as well with family. Socializing can be done at a park or museum. good luck.|||I totally agree with Jessica. I would just leave and go home. After a couple of times of this I'm sure your daughter will come around and calm down, but you have find out if there is another reason for this behavior also. Is she tired when you go out? Sometimes children act out because they are tired.|||take her to the bathroom... just make sure you wear a belt.|||My daughter was the same way at one point. What I do when my daughter acts up ( and she will be two in october) is the first time she starts whining I give her a warning, which she usually ignores. I let her sit on a chair or booth when at a restaurant cause the high chair was a battle I was not going to win. When she starts really getting fussy and begins crying and screaming I take her outside, or if it is close enough, to the car for awhile. I let her cool down and then take her back in. It is hard at times cause I have to leave my 3 yr old son with my husband at restaurants or stores till she calms down. One time I had to leave the restaurant all together because she threw a huge tantrum at denny's. It was horrible!! You have to take her out of the situation and let her know the consequences of her behavior. You tell her that she is not supposed to act like that and that she will go home everytime she does that again. You really can't wait to discipline when you get home because she may not understand that she is getting punished now for something she did an hour ago. She has to know that her unacceptable behavior will have an immediate consequence. It is hard but they do often outgrow it. My 3 yrs old son is much better now at restaurants then he was before. Remember that kids can't really sit or stay in one place for a long period of time. Restaurants especially can be tough. I suggest if you go out to eat that you order your daughters food ahead of time, as well as her drink and try to bring books or crayons with you to occupy her while she waits. Or play a game with her that will keep her mind busy like I spy or something like that. It will make the wait seem much shorter. And ask for the check early that way you can zoom out of there much faster if she begins to get bored. Good Luck!!|||calmly take her to the bathroom til she calms down.take her back out and try it again.if she does it again,take her out side.talking to her about "manners" in public won't help at this point.you need to gradually work in manners as she gets older and by example.kids learn what they see and hear so if she needs to know how to behave in private and public,she needs to be taught at the home first.that's how we were taught so we could be seen in public without embarrassing ourselves!some kids resist learning manners but if you keep at it,it'll sink in eventually.|||The restaurant-I would just leave b/c that will disturb others. Sounds like she just isn't ready for that yet. Shopping-strap her in the stroller and ignore her. always take a stroller wherever you go so you can strap her in and she will be safe. ignore the screaming and continue to walk around in the stroller. One day she will realize you aren't going to give in to her tantrums. Once she starts calming down (and she will even if it takes a while) then you can start going out to eat. Don't feel bad, dear. This is not an uncommon problem.|||Everytime she throws a fit take her home. Is it going to be inconvience for you? Yes. You have to be willing to leave a cart full of stuff at the store, and leave your dinner, but from my experience this will curb the behavior after you do it twice. Explain to your daughter why you are leaving and that the way she is actting is not acceptable behavior.|||i'd try to ignore her. Giving her a row or spanking her etc is just rising to what she wants. Ignore and then take her out if she still won't settle.|||Depends - if you want to teach her how to behave - I would find out when a dead time is for the restaurant and make plans to go out. I'd put her in the high chair so she can't run amuk. Put your foot on it to steady it so she doesn't hurt herself. Take plenty of things for her to do (a book, a hand held coloring toy - like etch-a-sketch, etc.). Let the restaurant know you're trying to teach her to sit and behave and to put you away from others in the corner. Start with just having a drink (short time period), when she can behave that long, the next time have a drink and appetizers, then dinner, etc. If you want to teach her that mis-behaving gets her what she wants (to leave)....then just up and leave when she gets angry. But, I think you want to teach her the correct way to behave. I'd have her in a stroller in a store too....there would be no throwing herself on the ground. Whew. You could apply the same theory here though. If you're running in for milk (short trip), let her walk (probably won't have a cart for just milk anyway). Walk as fast as you can and hold her hand so she's moving with you. Next time, longer, etc. Children have short attention spans, so when you're trying to teach a behavior, break it down...don't aim for the stars at first. Good luck!|||My son is/was the same way. Totally crazy in public because he knew we would give in to keep him quiet. So here's what we do now: At home...when he starts misbehaving I warn him to stop. I count to 3 and if he doesn't stop, he gets a timeout. I do this every time he misbehaves. It's gotten to the point now that if I just say, "ONE" he immediately stops. So when we go out, all I have to say is, "ONE" and he just freezes. Saying "ONE" is a lot smoother in public than yelling.|||At restaurants we tell her in a daddy/mommy tone to sit and quit crying and she usually listens. she fusses when we put her in a high chair or booster too. We try to sit in a booth and put her in the inside without the booster seat so she can stand or sit with out falling. That usually helps. As far as stores, we tell her if she is good she can pick something out. If she starts acting up she will not get to pick anything out. Sometime sit works, sometimes it doesn't but usually does.|||There are some good answers here already, but I'll add my two cents. First of all, neither my wife and I are fans of spanking. Not to say that we have never given a swat on the butt - we have; but we don't spank. My two oldest did similar things at your daughter's age. We stayed calm and explained that we "can't act like that." On a couple of occasions we left the restaurant and went home. Again, staying calm. We explained to our kids that we were disappointed that they did not get to eat at the restaurant and how sad that made us, and left it at that. It took a couple of trys, but it worked for us. Good luck, and don't get discouraged! This is not at all unusual for the age......

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